Do you feel worthless at times, like your needs don't matter? Just imagine … you were writing in your journal, would it sound like this?
/Here’s an entry from a young woman’s journal who’s sick of constantly worrying, walking on egg shells and people pleasing. If you recognise yourself here, and you agree it’s time to change - get your free guide here today.
Dear you,
I don't even know where to begin. I feel like I'm drowning in stress and anxiety, and I can't seem to find a way out. I just don't feel good enough, no matter what I do.
I'm constantly worried about what other people think of me. Am I doing enough? Am I saying the right things? Am I good enough to be here? These thoughts are constantly running through my head, and I can't seem to turn them off.
I even have a PhD in apologizing for things that aren't even my fault!!!
I know that I'm a people pleaser, and it's exhausting. I'm always trying to make everyone happy, but it feels like no matter what I do, it's never enough. I'm always worried that people will think I'm not good enough, that I'm not capable, that I'm not smart enough.
I try to remind myself that I am enough, but it's hard. It feels like I'm fighting against this constant tide of negativity, and I'm just not strong enough to keep it at bay.
I don't know how to relax. Even when I'm not doing anything, my mind is racing, going over all the things I could be doing, all the things I should be doing. I can't seem to just be still and enjoy the moment. It's like I'm always on edge, always waiting for something to go wrong.
I don't want to feel like this anymore. I don't want to be constantly stressed and anxious. I want to feel happy and confident and at peace. But I don't know how to get there.
I joke that I’m the master of the fake smile and nod.
I just keep it all bottled up inside, and it's like a pressure cooker waiting to explode. It's hard to talk to other people about this, too. I don't want to burden them with my problems, and I don't want them to think less of me because of my anxiety.
I know I need to take care of myself, but it's hard. It feels like there's always something more important to do, someone else who needs my attention. I don't want to be selfish, but I don't know how to balance taking care of myself with taking care of others.
I wish I could just be confident and sure of myself, like other people seem to be. I wish I didn't have to constantly second-guess myself and my decisions. I wish I could just be happy with who I am and not feel like I have to constantly strive to be better.
I'm pretty sure my mantra is 'don't rock the boat’.
But maybe that's the problem. Maybe I'm always trying to be better because I don't feel good enough in the first place. Maybe if I could just accept myself for who I am, flaws and all, I could finally find some peace.
It's hard to do that, though. It's hard to accept yourself when you feel like you're not good enough. But maybe that's the only way forward. Maybe I need to stop trying to be perfect and start accepting myself for who I am.
I don't know if I'm ready for that yet, though. It's scary to let go of the idea of perfection, to let go of the constant striving. But maybe it's worth it if it means finding some peace and happiness.
I don't know what the future holds, but I do know that I can't keep going like this. I need to find a way to manage my anxiety and stress, to stop being such a people pleaser, and to start accepting myself for who I am.
I don't know how to do that yet, but I'm willing to try. I'm willing to take small steps, to reach out for help, to be vulnerable and open. Maybe that's the only way forward.
I'm always worried about how other people perceive me. Do they think I'm smart enough? Pretty enough? Do they think I'm a good enough friend or a good enough partner? These thoughts are constantly running through my head, and I can't seem to shake them.
It’s like I'm the ultimate yes-woman, but I'm also pretty good at silently resenting everyone for it
I feel like I'm always on display, and I’m constantly worried about whether or not I'm meeting everyone's expectations. But the truth is, I don't think my needs matter. I put everyone else's needs above my own because I don't want to rock the boat, but it's starting to take a toll on me.
I feel like I'm constantly walking on eggshells, trying to make sure everyone else is happy, but I'm not happy. I'm not happy with who I am, and I'm not happy with the way people treat me. It's like they can sense my lack of confidence, and they treat me accordingly.
I feel like I'm always being judged, like people are constantly scrutinizing my every move. And it's not just strangers or acquaintances, it's even the people closest to me. I feel like they're always picking apart my flaws, and it's making me feel even more worthless.
I try to tell myself that I'm good enough, that I don't need anyone else's approval to be happy, but it's hard. It's hard to believe that when the world seems to be constantly telling me otherwise.
I wish I could just be confident in myself, to know that I'm enough just the way I am. But it's hard when it feels like everyone else is always expecting more from me, when they're always pointing out my flaws and shortcomings.
Who knew I had an allergy to saying 'no'!!!
I feel like I'm always apologizing, always saying sorry for things that aren't even my fault. But I'm so afraid of causing conflict or making someone upset that I'll take the blame for anything, even if I had nothing to do with it.
It's like I'm constantly trying to please everyone else, but no one is trying to please me. And it's not like I expect people to cater to my every whim, but it would be nice if they could at least consider my feelings and needs every once in a while.
I don't know how to break out of this cycle, though. I don't know how to start putting my own needs first, or how to stop seeking validation from others. It's like I'm stuck in this rut, and I don't know how to climb out of it.
I feel like a chameleon, always changing to fit in with whoever I'm with.
I'm so tired of feeling like I'm not good enough, of feeling like I'm constantly failing. I wish I could just be happy with who I am, flaws and all, but it's hard when it feels like the rest of the world is always telling me I'm not good enough.
But maybe that's the key. Maybe I need to stop listening to everyone else and start listening to myself. Maybe I need to start putting my own needs first, and stop trying to be everything to everyone.
It's scary, though. It's scary to think about changing, about putting myself out there and being vulnerable. But I don't think I can keep feeling like this, feeling worthless and insignificant.
Yep, I'm the ultimate peacekeeper, even if it means sacrificing my own peace.
I don't know what the future holds, but I know I need to start making changes. I need to start believing in myself, in my own worth and value, and stop seeking validation from others.
I know it's not going to be easy, but I have to try. I have to try to break out of this cycle, to start living for myself and not for everyone else.
It's hard to imagine what that will look like, though. I've spent so long trying to please everyone else that I don't even know what I want or need anymore. But maybe that's where I need to start, by figuring out what it is that I want and need, and then working towards that.
Is it weird that I walk past a vending machine and know how it feels - always ready to dispense whatever people want from me.
It's scary to think about putting myself first, though. I'm so used to thinking about everyone else that it feels selfish to even consider my own needs. But I know that's not true. I know that it's important to take care of myself, to make sure I'm happy and healthy.
I think part of the problem is that I've always equated perfection with acceptance. I thought that if I could just be perfect, then everyone would accept me and love me. But I'm starting to realize that's not true. No one is perfect, and trying to be perfect is just setting myself up for failure.
I need to start accepting myself, flaws and all. I need to stop thinking that I'm not good enough, and start realizing that I'm worthy of love and acceptance just the way I am.
If I took a personality test I’m pretty sure I’d be 50% accommodating and 50% passive-aggressive!??!!!
It's going to be a long road, though. I know that. It's not going to be easy to break out of these patterns and start living for myself. But I'm willing to try. I'm willing to put in the work to start believing in myself and my own worth.
I know there will be setbacks along the way, moments where I slip back into old habits and patterns. But I have to remember that it's a journey, not a destination. I have to keep moving forward, even if it's just one step at a time.
I don't know what the future holds, but I know that I can't keep living like this. I can't keep feeling worthless and insignificant. I have to start believing in myself, and I have to start making changes.
So, I'm going to take a deep breath, and I'm going to start. I'm going to start by putting myself first, by figuring out what it is that I want and need, and then working towards that. And I'm going to start by believing in myself, in my own worth and value.
It's not going to be easy, but I know I can do it. I know that I'm strong enough to make these changes and to start living for myself. And I know that in the end, it will be worth it.